First of all, I need to tell you that right now, I’m sitting in my brother’s kitchen in Philadelphia listening to a parrot sing “Somewhere Over The Rainbow” as only a parrot can interpret it. Imagine dropping acid and then renting The Wizard of Oz and you’re most of the way there. This is a family that gets a turkey every Thanksgiving, names it and lets it wander around the house for a week, and then eats ham.
In other news, I think I hate parrots.
They say “90% of...