"I'd like to take you back 17 years when a peanut farmer was in the White House, a group-a boys callin' themselves Queen topped the record charts and Gladys Leeman was Gladys Wood and she was Mount Rose American Teen Princess!"
I wasn't even old enough to tie my own shoes the first time I competed in a beauty pageant. Now, it's crucial in a post-"Toddlers and Tiaras" world to emphasize that the pageant circuit I grew up in was far less "spray tans and Go-Go juice," and a lot more like the...